More on Grandparents and Then I Want to Talk about Today

Well - I said so much about Ella in yesterday's post.

I loved her.  Can you tell?

To be fair - Ella was about 50 when I was born - so she had that in her favor - time to interact with me and all of her grandchildren - and the energy - plus we lived in the same town - and she was just very very maternal.  I know that she was.  I saw her in action.  Even when my children were around her and my cousin's children - she was rather aged by then - but had not lost her enthusiasm toward her offspring - not at all.

I remember the first time I took Ann home to Evergreen - she was 2 months old and I knew my aunt Florence was on her way over with Ella  to see Ann - I think Ella must have been 79 - and I was standing by the baby bed where Ann was and Ella came in the room with much excitement and laughter and speed and saying, "Oh, I can't wait to see what Elizabeth's baby looks like!"  I could have sworn I saw the glistening of tears in her eyes.  I think I did.

But.....my other grandmother - my daddy's mother -

Antoinette Murphree Wilkerson.  She was 79 when I was born.  She born in 1872 in Troy, AL

She had a gleeful smile and demeanor - a high laughter, I think.  She really was fond of Mary Ann and me and I think loved our little girl ways.  It was just always so much more formal at her house when we visited.  My favorite memory of her is during one of our visits - and I had to be very very young - like 3 or 4 - she walked me down Murphree Street where she had always lived and knew all of her neighbors - and she had me by the hand  -  I had on a very nice Sunday dress with a short full skirt - she was literally showing me off to all her neighbors.  I loved that.  They were oohing and ahhing over me and I was loving the attention - I can feel myself strutting and strolling and feeling very good about the situation.

Other memory - even now the smell of clean sheets remind me of visiting her.  Well, of course  -  I finally realized - it was because she naturally had had her maid (not herself) put clean sheets on the beds when we were coming to stay overnight.  Ivory Soap - simple plain soap smells to me like her bathroom.  It was very large with a clawfoot tub - the bathroom had a fireplace in it.  Her bedroom doors and I suppose all other doors had transoms over them.  Mary Ann and I usually slept in her sleighbed and besides smellling the clean sheets I can feel myself staring up at that transom and being a bit nervous - also on the mantel in that bedroom (all the rooms had a fireplace) was a picture of my dad when he was very young.  I would also stare at it.


(Edit to this post:  I found the picture of Daddy which I would stare at - periodically - besides the times I was laying in bed.  I was just curious about all of it - I knew it was a time when Daddy belonged to Grandmother and Granddaddy - and not to us - it was a mystery to me - they loved him first)

And - I remember one evening watching her comb her long thin gray hair before bed.  A classic image. When I saw the movie, Driving Miss Daisy, Jessica Tandy's character, Miss Daisy, reminded me so much of my grandmother.

Here, let me show you a picture

Below is a picture of Grandmother in 1936.  

She was 64.

and here she is a young lady, probably before she married

and probably in her parents' home in Troy.

Do you see the piece of furniture in the left side of the picture?

That is a music stand.  It is in Mary Ann's house now, in Evergreen.

But it was always in Grandmother's Library - across the room from her Baby Grand Piano.

When Grandmother had it, it had a burgundy curtain across the front of the shelves which held the piano music.  

Once when we were in Troy, Mother and Daddy were visiting some of Daddy's friends and had left Mary Ann and me with Grandmother and Granddaddy.  Not a common occurrence. 

Mary Ann and I were roaming about their large house and the memory has us in the Library

and I was curiously separating the burgundy curtain to see what was behind it.

At that moment G'mother and G'daddy appeared in the room

and with a very gentle, kind tone

told me not to bother the curtain or the music stand.

The whole situation was so very intimidating that I slipped away into the back bedroom and unintentionally fell asleep.  I woke up to Mother's face. She was waking me from my nap.

I have no recollection of how Mary Ann handled all of that.

Here's a sweet memory of Grandmother - she must have realized that Mary Ann and I were somewhat bored as all the adults conversed in the living room - or what they always called "The Front Hall" -

She invited Mary Ann and me to go out back with her and she showed us some mossy areas on the ground and gave us flat sticks to scrape up the moss.  It was something she had done as a child, I think.  I can't remember what we were supposed to do with the moss.  Also, she took us to a sandy area just outside the door of my Uncle Halbert's Art Studio/Work Shop and gave us, again, some sticks and told us how to recognize the holes of doodle bugs???? and how to use the sticks to coax them out.  I remember preferring the playing with the moss.  Wasn't too keen on the bugs.

There really are a lot of good memories of visiting my grandparents in Troy - it was just so different from our life in Evergreen.  So different - but with just as many, or more, relatives living there.  Not as many first cousins - only 4 - but Daddy had so many cousins and distant cousins there.  I was always under the impression we were related to just about everyone there.  Of course we weren't, but it felt like it. Well, Grandmother was one of 5 siblings and Granddaddy - well - he had multiple siblings - but it was Grandmother's family that always seemed to be in the forefront.

Something unique - when we went for a holiday dinner - like Christmas or Thanksgiving - we sat in their formal dining room and Grandmother had a little bell by her plate.  If we needed something, she'd ding a ling that little bell and magically would appear her very very very sweet and comfortable maid/cook, Willy.  Willy had a limp and had a few freckles over her nose - much like Morgan Freeman, the actor.  Do you know what I mean?

Willy had the best nature and disposition and is the cook I remember.  She always greeted us with many hugs when we drove up into their back yard.  I wonder, now, what she thought about her life, working there amongst the upper crust of Troy, AL - the deep, segregated south.  What did she think of all of us and our white ways and white opinions and white attitudes?  I have some things from Grandmother's kitchen - things I use.  A very large pot.  A rolling pin.  I have her enamelware table.  I love those things and while they belonged to Grandmother - I always think of Willy when I use them.  I imagine all that she did with those cooking utensils.  I think about her life.

I must end this post.

Looks like there might be a few more things I'll want to say on the subject.

I hope I can remember what I wanted to say about today.

It had a lot to do with a conversation I had in Express Lube today.

Just the different kinds of personalities we can run into during our daily routines.

Still in Black & White

Did anyone read the post in which I wrote that my grandfather was very interested in Astronomy?

He was.  So was my uncle, Halbert, my dad's oldest brother.

Together they built this telescope and

the observatory in the next picture below.

That's Granddaddy in the space for viewing.

Do you see him?

So, sharing all of this with the reader,

I have this bit of memorabilia - a cutout from the Montgomery Advertiser.

Granddaddy submitted a letter to this regular feature.

It was in the Saturday Paper, February 11, 1956.

I was 4, about to turn 5 in July.

I wasn't reading newspapers in those days.

Just watching Howdy Doody on Saturday morning at 8:00.

His letter:  The Pleasures of Astronomy Editor, The Advertiser:  As a constant subscriber over many years to your valuable paper, I am calling your attention to the display of the stars in the heavens last evening.      Only those who have a telescope, such as that of my son, would have gone out last evening with me to look at the unusual brilliant display which occurred:  Orion, the planet, Jupiter and the Milky Way were among those objects to be seen.  There was no moon, and not a cloud to be seen, but the Nebula in Andromeda was worth seeing, including other objects, but not including the big and little dippers.    Take your force out some fair and cold night, with overcoats and show what can be seen.  Limitless in distance, realizing that somewhere in outer space is the heaven or the hell to which we are all foredoomed, after our eyes have been closed in death.   Troy, Ala.  J.H. Wilkerson

and with that,

below is a postcard when he, and apparently, grandmother with him, travelled to see the Smokey Mtns.

He mentions, again, his telescope in his note to Halbert who remained at home.

It reads above, "We take a trip everyday to some point, over mountain roads and foot.  Guess you went to C. Lake.  We will stay at Mrs. T.L. Gwyn's until Sat. morning.  This is much better place than Asheville.  Look at Mars Thursday with the 10 inch - See you no later than Sunday.  Father.

Waynesville - 7/24"   Postmarked 1939

Halbert stayed here, at home (picture below), while Granddaddy and  Grandmother travelled, that summer.

The picture of Daddy, yesterday, with his first band, which I posted, was taken in 1939, in December.

Wonder if they visited Daddy in Holly Springs.  I wonder if theirs was a really long roadtrip.

I don't know.  Just Wondering.

Are we getting tired of the old black and whites?

Laura Beth commented yesterday that she isn't tired of them.

I only need just a little bit of encouragement.

Band Camp, Some More

While we're on the subject

and while my camera is away being repaired

and since I have kazillion old photos - I mean - a lot!

I might as well show anyone who read yesterday's post

what band camp looked like in Auburn, in 1955-56-57

Just a few.

First, a disclaimer:  It is often said that in posting on blogs - the writer will not be transparent about failure, about shortcomings, just about the way "it" really is - perfect mother, perfect friend, perfect grandmother - even when we're making an effort to be transparent - well - who's gonna give the whole story?  I'll tell you right now - you're gonna have to take my word for it - this blogger is so insanely ordinary and not spectacular and, and, and.....well - it's probably gonna stay pretty general.  Unless God gets specific about telling me to "air dirty laundry" - it's not that easy or wise to do - but - I'm willing to answer questions and be honest.  Got any questions?  


But this disclaimer isn't about that - what I wanted to say is - my pride really rears its very ugly head, and this could be a pun, when it comes to bad pictures.  Trouble is, most of my pictures are bad.  I don't mean I always look bad, but just, darn it, not photogenic.  The camera catches me in the weirdest faces. We all know that some people look better in pictures than they do in real life.  Well, the flip side is, and I hope hope hope this is so - that some of us look better in real life than in pictures.  If I look better in pictures than in real life - well - just don't anybody tell me.  Again - my pride - I'm not that broken yet.  I guess I am - I can handle it.  I'm getting closer to heaven everyday and I'll be gorgeous there.


Anyway - do any of us want to put up a bad photo?  Not this girl - and  the good ones are hard to find.


So - out of respect for my dear mom and dad - and for the love of their memory - I hate putting up bad pictures of them - and these old ones  - styles were really different - and - well - I've looked for the best ones.  There were a lot that weren't the best - I nixed them.


Whew!  That was a long disclaimer.  It was a whole post!

So - band camp and what life looked like there, in Auburn, when I was missing Daddy in Evergreen, AL.

Here they are practicing - and yeah - are you like me?  Do those majorettes have on bathing suits?

Next Picture, below:

My Dad is 2nd from the right. 4th from the left.

with band directors from Florala, Enterprise, Anniston and Elmore County.

Wonder what they're talking about and what each one is thinking.

Looks like the BD from Elmore County on the far right is telling something, and their eyes are on him.

But what are they thinking?

It's band camp, it's competition, it's men.

Interesting, the body language.

In the next picture:

The guy looking back, with sunglasses, is Bill Haynes.

During the season when students' parents bought them instruments, 

Bill Haynes was a fixture in our house and at the bandroom.

He worked for Art's Music Store in Montgomery.

Our car went straight to that store in downtown Montgomery during those years - when we made our pilgrimage to Montgomery via highway 31.

Bill Haynes could play the clarinet very well - which I realized in a surprised sort of way when he performed with our band during practice one day.  I thought he just sold instruments. 

Of course he was a musician.  It had never occurred to me.

More practice - again- the majorettes - Is that the earliest version of the stadium, there in the background?

Next,

The 1956-57 band - the one Daddy took to camp - when I missed him so - and all the other ones too -

until I grew too old to think he was the only love of my life.  That would probably be 1st grade, when I became aware of C. W.

And while we're on the subject of bands - below is Daddy's first band in Holly Springs, MS.

He was fresh out of Northwestern University.  December 14th, 1939 is handwritten on the back of the photo, and that is 26 year old Frank Wilkerson (Dad) on the front row, left - in the suit.

for some reason, I love this next picture.

While Daddy is still younger than I ever remember - I think it's 1947 -

I recall the lowered head - when he turned around after a performance, for a slight bow.

In the middle row, 3rd from left is my aunt, Mary.  She probably knew Daddy before Mother did.

She was still in school when Mother met "the new band director, Frank Wilkerson".

and the 1962-63 band.  I know so many of these people.

The head majorette is my cousin, Suzanne.

The one who has been in many of my recent "cousin" posts.

I suppose this is as large as any EHS band grew.

Wasn't big - but for us - in those days - it was good.

Andalusia, we knew, had a bigger band.

T.R. Miller?  I think maybe.

then the city ones - well - and we didn't' even know there was a place called Scottsboro, AL. At least, I didn't.

How can I not include my senior year?  In color!!!

I'm finally a majorette - after 2 tryouts I made it on the 3rd.

I'm on the right - third from the right, middle row.

That's it.

Wonder when they're gonna have my camera ready?  2 to 3 weeks?

Whoa - lots of delving into the past!

My Brain Is in Troy, Alabama

The last dream I had before I woke up this morning was about my paternal grandfather in Troy - only in the dream he looked more like my maternal grandfather from Evergreen - analyze that! I was at some conference/retreat thing - spiritual in nature, I think - and having a rare opportunity to "get acquainted with my grandfather". In the dream we were both feeling a sadness over the fact that we'd never had the time to get to know each other(he died when I was about 4 or 5/my mother's dad died when I was 15) In the dream I watched him walk away, I guess go back to heaven - I don't know. How hard is it to describe a dream?! Very difficult. Next scene I'm walking in the front door of his house at 110 Murphree Street in Troy Alabama. In reality, the house actually ended up belonging to my uncle, my dad's bachelor brother who always lived in that house with his parents until they died and then until he died in 1985. Back to the dream, I walked in the very large front door, and a handfull of my friends were there. One was sitting on the couch in the "front hall", another to the right in the "library"; I spoke with them and walked into the dining room, speaking with my uncle Halbert about all the things in there - in the dream I knew that he was about to sell the house to some girl who I knew wouldn't respect the true beauty of the house - I was very sad. He and I walked into the breakfast room and then into the kitchen. From the kitchen I walked out on the back porch and then through the bedrooms and back again into the "front hall". (It was always called that, although it was more like a formal living room.) (Also, the back porch was more of an enclosed room - the back wall was screened with lattice covering the screen.) In my dream I can see everything in those rooms just as they used to be - amazing, the brain and what it records.

Next scene I'm walking to my car, talking to my Dad(who hasn't, up to this point, been in the dream - and all of a sudden I'm the age when I was still single (I married at age 28 - Ann just had her 3rd baby at age 28) Only in the dream Daddy is Daddy, but he's also Charlie(my husband if you are reading this and don't know me). That too is odd - but he's mostly Daddy - and I'm appealing to him, pleading, I want to own that house and I want to live in Troy - make my life in Troy - because I have a sense that I am just starting out - whatever career I might begin - And he agrees - He says, "Okay - well I'll just have to talk with Charlie and draw up the papers". Then, in that moment Charlie is in my life - but not my husband really - crazy - but the incredible sense of relief - that I have saved that house - it will be mine and always mine and knowing all the work I'll have to do and all the money I will have to earn to restore it - I was so happy and so relieved and I woke up.

That is always a shock - to wake up after a very real dream - and it was 2009, I'm living in Scottsboro - I've lived in Scottsboro for 29 years - but my brain still travels back to Evergreen and to Troy. I got up and had a cup of coffee. Love that first cup of coffee.

With Troy still on my brain, I decided that was a cue to blog about old Troy memories - and I sat in the hall in front of the cabinet where I keep the old Troy stuff - there's so much - where to begin - and I landed on an old letter written to my grandmother from a friend. The letter really has very little interest to me, since I don't know the lady - but it's a slice of life from 1911. I read it - it was important enough to my grandmother to "glue" into her scrapbook - so they must have been good friends. After reading it, I looked at the address and the date. The return address is 486 Spring Street, Atlanta, GA. The extent of the address is:

Mrs. John Wilkerson

Troy,

Ala

The postmark is Atlanta, GA December 29, 1911 - and there are two green one cent stamps on it.

It's 1911, so Daddy hadn't even been born yet. He was born in 1913.

Here is how it reads

486 Spring St

Dec 28th 1911

My dear Net

You have no idea how much pleasure that beautiful picture you sent me has given us. I have it on my bureau and I can't help taking it up and gazing at it whenever I am in my room. I think the older boy is the image of John and the baby (is it a boy too?) is just like you. I wrote to Claire about the picture and wished she had one too. I think it is one of the sweetest pictures I ever saw.

We had a very quiet time Christmas. My children remembered me so generously. You know I have so many children now I am rich & I expect Delmar will marry in the Spring, a lovely girl just twenty yrs old. It has not been announced yet but I suppose it will be in April.

Gordon married a lovely girl and is very happy. Ella is living right across the street from us keeping house in her own home. Nell & her husband & baby are with us. Her husband is in business here & they board with us. The baby is nine months old and is the best baby I ever saw. We have never had a nurse for her. We are going to have her picture taken and I will send you one.

I hope you had a happy Christmas and will enjoy all the happiness and prosperity next year that heart could wish.

Remember me to John & all the rest of my friends

Lovingly

Your Friend

Mrs. P H Baker

Okay - so I was curious - I mapquested that address. Well, I expected it to be in some "scary" part of Atlanta, if it still existed at all - since that was 98 years ago - You know how old nice neighborhoods in cities become the "rougher" areas as people evolve and move into newer developed areas. Actually, it's in downtown Atlanta. The address is still there, but I'm guessing a lot of medical businesses - it's close to a hospital - I-75 and I-85 cross over that street.

Also - funny that while they sound as if they are dear friends, she did not know if my uncle Thomas was a boy or a girl - I'm guessing his hair was cut "long" for a boy - and he had on rather billowy clothing. He was probably only a year old - I think he was 3 years older than daddy. Grandmother must not have put his name on the picture. I wonder if it might have been a Christmas card photo situation. Remember, not only was there no email in those days - the phoning was extremely limited and even postal stuff - well - who could write all those notes to all those people who moved away - but there was no TV - so I think there were many letters written. Either this Mrs. Baker was a good bit older than Grandmother(her children were young marrieds) or she married much younger than my grandmother who actually did marry considerably late for that time. I think Grandmother, like myself, was in her late twenties when she married. Daddy was 34 when he married my mother who was 28. Granddaddy was a good bit older than Grandmother - so our generations are really stretched far apart. Daddy was 38 when I was born - so my grandfather was quite old - hence he died before I could really know him, but I have very vivid mental images of him. Very vivid and he made quite an impression on me. I think I must have been in awe of him and a little curious at his dignified air, yet warm air. I think he was a very kind and caring man - but reserved - which was common for the culture then. My maternal grandfather had a different feel - but equally kind and caring - but such a unique personality - and a bit more "user friendly".

So - that is that letter - and that world in 1911.

I need to do other stuff - but I feel like writing about a lot of Troy memories - that dream really spurred me on -

I've got to end this post. I have a million things to do.

Well, guess what?

Okay, all of this is an edit to the post I just published. Because - I got up from the computer, went to put that very old letter back into the very old envelope which was glued into my grandmother's very old scrapbook - and my eyes landed on another small old envelope which was postmarked Atlanta, GA July 8 1913 - yet different handwriting from the other Atlanta, GA note which I just transcribed above. So, I got myself another cup of coffee and a Fiber One Bar and sat down to read the contents of this next envelope.

This next envelope holds 2 different notes written to my grandmother - It would appear that Mrs. P H Baker died and Grandmother had written sympathy letters to her daughters, who had been mentioned in her 1911 December note to Grandmother. That saddened me, because it's only 2 years later - and she had written so highly of her children - now they are writing regarding their mother.

Here they are:(another little item of interest - this is July 1913 - Daddy would be 2 months old - grandmother adjusting to having a 3rd son)

My dear Nett

I want to thank you for your sweet note of sympathy. I don't know how we will ever live without Mama. She was just as young and energetic when she died as when she lived in Troy. It was a terrible blow and one that will be hard to get over. We miss her in everything we do and everywhere we go for we treated her as a chum more than anything else.

I believe Mama expected to have her little visit with you although she would always put off her pleasures for ours and there was something to keep her at home all of the time, but she often spoke of you and how she would enjoy visiting you and seeing your children.

Sister came down from New York and stayed for two or three days with us. She kind-- in a way just filled Mama's place while she was here.

Mama was digging in her flowers early in the morning and we felt uneasy and went to look for her and she was under a little tree where she had sat down and probably fell back, dead with the hoe still in her hand. Wasn't that a beautiful way to go. She would have been miserable if we had had to wait on her a day - The girls and boys also want me to thank you for your sweet notes.

Most Sincerely,

Ella B. Ruse

411 (or 471) Spring Street.

Other Note in the Very Old and Browned Stained Envelope:

Sunday -

My dear Net,

We are all so stunned and heart-broken for Mama that we can hardly think.

She has been perfectly well and just as active as ever. You know Mama could do more than anybody. Honey spent the night out with us Tuesday night and we all played the piano & sang and Mama was as jolly as any one of us. We sat up till about eleven o'clock and when we went to bed Mama said she was going to get up early and dig around her roses. She does that often and I heard her get up and walk down the drive. I dozed off and waked up at six o'clock feeling awfully anxious about her because everything was so still. I dressed and went out to look for her and found her under a little tree already gone - It nearly killed us all. Her mother went the same way and Mama had always said that she wanted to go that way. But we are so lonesome and miserable without her. We all depended on her just like we did when we were little children.

She spoke of you so sweetly the other day and said she wanted to write you. She was so fond of you, Net, and I do wish that she could have visited you. She wanted to very much, but something always happened to prevent. Sister came down and stayed a week with us. The shock was awful for her.

We all try to be as cheerful as we can because we know that Mama would want us to.

We appreciated your sweet letter so much and I wish you would write to us when you can. I would love to hear from you.

Guess you don't know about Buddie's baby girl. She is a darling and Buddie is so happy over his little family.

Give my love, love from all of us, to Miss Josie and all your family. Sister wished so much that she could see you when she was here.

Affectionately

Nell Baker Strong

(A small aside - on the 1913 envelope is one red 2 cent stamp - instead of the 2 green one cent stamps that were on the 1911 envelope)

What has been will be again, what has been done will be done again; there is nothing new under the sun. Is there anything of which one can say, "Look! This is something new"? It was here already, long ago; it was here before our time. There is no remembrance of men of old, and even those who are yet to come will not be remembered by those who follow. Ecclesiastes 1:9-11

And while this is true, it was written by a despairing Solomon - and he was reflecting on the hopelessness of our flesh and the fact that we are all a vapor - James 4:14 - "You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes" - we have the hope of Christ and Eternity and that is what gives our small, repetitive lives meaning if we have truly been born again- He, the God of all Creation is working out His plans in us - when we are yielded to Him - there - we have the supernatural privilege of offering our lives to Him for Him to be glorified in us. OH PRIVILEGE!!

So our best memories, the best of homes and houses and lives, turn to dust - but when we have been raised in newness of life by the resurrected Christ, then the best is before us - in eternity.

I still find it so very interesting to look back into these lives and old cultures and see the same emotions, the same relationships, the delight of the births of new babies and the excitement of living out daily, disciplined lives. God made us that way and all generations do it and continue to move on.